Episode 9 - How to Be a Leader Staff Actually Respect

Transcript

Aretha Franklin wanted it and comedian Rodney Dangerfield said he never got it: respect.

Not being respected is a complaint that supervisors share often in my Frontline Supervisor Training.

Let's talk about it!

In one training, I even encountered a supervisor who reported that she was spending her precious
staff meeting time explaining to her DSPs that they should be showing her respect.

My heart broke for her. I get it.

It's so confusing because you are respectful to your organization's leadership. You worked hard in your former role. You got a promotion and you are so excited to guide your team to provide great services. But no one is listening.

You feel frustrated, defeated, confused, disrespected, and if we're being honest, you're
probably a little pissed off. Then you've got good reason to be. You have big responsibilities. You want to do a good job, and your team is just not cooperating.

Hello and welcome to Provider Power with your host Sara Sherman. This is the place for IDD leaders to find solutions, support, and insights. Ready to power up your provider game?

Let's go!

Today's episode is being sponsored by my upcoming free training From Lazy Staff to
High Performers.

I hear it in every single frontline supervisor training.

Every single one, without fail. Supervisors tell me, my staff are lazy. And then... crickets. It's like mic drop.

My staff are just lazy, Sara. There's nothing I can do. I have these defective humans working here, and until someone hires people who are not defective, work is not going to be done.

Compliance isn't happening, and individuals are not going to get what they need.

And there's nothing I can do about it because these staff are lazy.

But what if the issue isn't lazy staff?

What if there are some very clear actions you can take to move the work and the staff in the right direction?

Well, guess what?

There are some clear steps, and I'm going to teach them to you for free.

Yep, in one hour, for free.

Consider this your invitation to From Lazy Staff to High Performers, a free masterclass.

It's April 23rd, 1 p.m. Eastern via Zoom.

Just head over to providerpowermoves.com/lazy

In one hour, you'll have practical, implementable strategies to effectively manage staff who look to you like they're lazy.

Again, providerpowermoves.com/lazy, or check the show notes for the link. See you there!

All right, back to our respect issue.

Respect.

You don't feel it?

You don't know how to get it, and you are responsible for a team that is not following your directions.

If you've reached out to someone for help about this lack of respect issue or you have expressed your frustrations to someone, you have probably heard a few cliches in response.

Such as, respect isn't given, it's earned.

Respect them, and they'll respect you.

Respect is there until it's lost. Once lost, respect is hard to get back.

If you've heard any of these sage words of wisdom, you know that they are not the least bit helpful, and don't help you figure out how to solve your problem at all.

So what's the solution?

Here are four questions that I want you to ask yourself:

- Do I know my job?
- Do I speak with authority?
- Do I mean what I say?
- And do I check and verify?

Why do these questions matter?

Because the issue you're contending with is not one of respect. It's one of trust.

Let me say that again.

The issue you are dealing with is not one of respect, it's one of trust.

Remember my gal who was spending her staff meetings explaining to her staff that they should be respecting her?

Why do you think it looked like they didn't respect her?

People don't follow a leader they don't trust!

She was a lovely person, and her staff were not mean, they simply didn't follow her instructions because they didn't trust those instructions.

You see my gal was expecting blind direction following simply because she was in the role of supervisor, discerning staff don't follow blindly, and while they are a little more challenging to supervise, discerning staff provide better services.

Now back to our questions, let's take them one at a time. As I go through each question, I want you to rate yourself on a scale from one to ten. And be honest with yourself, nobody else is going to know the answer.

If you aren't honest, you're not going to improve your situation.

If you say the wrong number, your gut will tell you, listen to your gut.

Alright, question number one, do you know your job?

Do you know company policies and procedures?

Do you know the regulations that govern the services that you provide?

Now you don't have to have all of this information memorized, but you do need to reference requirements before executing and giving instructions anytime that you don't have the required information memorized.

If your staff know more than you do, or following your instructions means that they're going to make mistakes, then your staff are going to do what they want, instead of what you're telling them to do.

Question number two, do you speak with authority?

One to ten, what do you think?

We're not talking about being dictatorial, bossy, demanding, or mean here.

What I'm saying is do you express yourself confidently, or do you hesitate?

Do you make eye contact, stand up straight, feel confident about what you're saying?

Do you welcome questions and open dialogue, or do you appear to hide to avoid interaction?

Do you communicate more behind the safety of email or text, or are you actually out talking to people?

As the leader, you need to know what you're talking about, and you need to connect with your people, and you must present yourself confidently.

Question number three, do you mean what you say?

One to ten, what do you think?

If you say staff need to be on time, are you on time?

If you say work needs to be done by the deadline, is your work done by the deadline?

If you say there will be consequences for errors, are there?

If you say you will follow up and or get back to staff, do you?

If you do not demonstrate that you mean what you say, or you are inconsistent in demonstrating that you mean what you say, your staff will see this, and they will act accordingly, and you will not feel respected.

Question four, do you check and verify?

One to ten, what do you think?

Are you visible?

Are you checking documents?

Do you observe service delivery?

Do you know what is in service plans?

Do you make sure that the work that your staff are doing is in alignment with those service
plans?

Does documentation reflect the services that were provided?

If you aren't checking, your staff will get the message that their performance really
doesn't matter.

Your staff will feel, why should I bother?

Nobody cares, why should I?

If it were important, my boss would be around and would be checking.

You will feel like they are disrespecting you.

They are following your lead.

Regardless of your words, you are sending the message that it doesn't really matter
if they perform correctly.

So they will wait till your lips stop moving, watch your actions, and they will follow.

If shoring up any of these issues would help you to improve your trustworthiness and respectability, grab some paper and outline the steps that you will take to strengthen your position as an effective supervisor, and implement your plan consistently.

When you know your job, speak with authority, mean what you say, and check and verify the respect will come because your staff will trust you.

And if you're in a position other than a frontline supervisor and you're listening to this podcast, same questions apply to you.

Just amend the expectations for your responsibilities.

In the meantime, be sure to sign up for the free masterclass, April 23rd at 1 PM Eastern.

Head on over to providerpowermoves.com/lazy

And finally, if this podcast resonates with you, be sure to like, follow, subscribe, and share so you don't miss an episode and neither do your colleagues.

Give those questions a try, I would love to hear how it's going for you.

Make me an email at sara@providerpowermoves.com and let me know how it's going.

Until next time, power on!